Professional counselling center Kitchener will give you some tips on how to cooperate with your ex – spouse and be good parents for your children.
Recall the nice things and moments when you were happy. Children love to love both parents and know that they are the fruit of love. Thus, they will develop a good image of themselves, and have the basis to maintain a good relationship with both parents, without the dilemma who they may love, and whether, if they love both, they will hurt one of them.
A child should always be welcomed in both homes
Staying with both parents should be as pleasant as possible. Create common activities and better fulfill your time together. If a child wants to, for example, go to dad and before the scheduled weekend, do not deny it and strictly comply with court decisions if it does not significantly impair your everyday obligations. All this will convince the child that both parents are well-worn with the new situation and that they do not care about them.
Make an agreement about upbringing
It often happens that adults use children for their hurt to “return” and to care for their ex-partner, or to gain a child’s affection. Thus, one parent may request that the homework be done as soon as the child comes from school, and vice versa. One parent can set the rule to come home at a certain time or to spend half a day on the computer, while at another, time it is unlimited. Parents must be consistent, for the majority of questions to establish the same rules and leave their frustrations aside when it comes to children! Children will also find it easier when they do not have to adapt and evaluate the situation again.
Understand that a child has the right to live
With growing up and entering into adolescence, children begin to become independent. It can be difficult for parents to fall into the fact that the already limited time available to the child will start to get even more shortened. For example, a child will have the need to stay over the weekend with the parent he lives with so as not to miss a birthday with another or other girl in the area. Understand this, adjust yourself and make compromises. By insisting on a joint time, you will only push the child away from you. Give the kids space to build their lives.
Do not introduce your child with new partners too soon
The child needs a lot of time to get used to the very fact that parents have divorced and accepted a new way of life. Most children never really accept it, and as adults, they often define that their greatest desire was and remain to have both parents under the same roof. Do not make it even more difficult for this stage and the fact that there are already some new people you need to devote to and with whom you will share your attention. Especially do not burden them with non-serious relationships. Reactions to new partners will be different, and understand for that.
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